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  • Hacker News
  • >"US Military asks troops for 'creative and unconventional' ideas to punish Iran"

    I don't know, how about:

    make peace with them?

    ?

    (I'm guessing that that idea is either too creative and/or too unconventional to be considered! :-) (And yes, I am bracing for the disingenuous one or two line bot comments and downvotes!))

  • So, with a false pretense, you destroyed their country, which already had scarse resources, and now you would just "offer peace"? Not that I disagree with making peace, but it simply looks extremely unjust
  • Here is an idea: the only way to win is a large and extremely costly invasion, actual troops on the ground for probably a decade.

    Nobody wants to pay that price. It was insane to start this war, and everybody knew it but Netanyahu and Trump. I can't believe Rubio was stupid enough to go along with it.

  • American exceptionalism is a poison to the mind. Elect people who are "true believers", and this is the expected outcome.
  • What every admin in this century has done is to avoid declaring what construes "winning" -- which is rather convenient to them as far as how they are to be judged on waging that war.
  • Blast Ted Nugent at them.
  • Air drop kid rock on Tehran
  • Send Trump to Iran. Inside a gift box with a fancy bow. Iran destruction guaranteed.

    If you don't believe me, look at the ruins formerly called White House

    There is a chance that the ground will open and the strait water will become lava, but is a risk that I'm willing to take

  • The easiest weapon to use is demographics: Offer a visa to any Iranian woman under 25.
  • The big question is why ask meatbags for creative solutions, when they have access to these WMDs like mythos?
  • Airdrop Hershey’s chocolate over Tehran.
  • Modern post-enshittification Hershey's chocolate is a war crime for being awful.
  • Someone who had no idea where he was getting himself into has no idea how to leave.
  • Re-route all phone traffic to Comcast Customer Service.
  • You have no idea what you've unleashed. What if this is actually done? They said "punish", not eternal damnation! Somehow, we must prevent CENTCOM from finding this comment. We can get away with abducting Venezuelan presidents, even prejudicial executions of narco sailors, but this would set a precedent the world cannot afford.

    And I think you should consider some serious self reflection. If you are having such extreme ideation, you may need help.

  • >“We are looking for new creative and unconventional ways to pressure and punish Iran,” an officer in US Central Command’s intelligence branch wrote in a message sent Wednesday to a broad group of military analysts, according to a source familiar with the message. A second source also said that a senior US military officer sent the message last week soliciting new ideas for how to deal with Iran.

    Still somewhat better than just asking ChatGPT, I guess?

  • They've been doing that (ask an LLM) since the start, and look at how much "success" we've had!
  • To punish them for being invaded by us? The abuser saying "Why did you make me hit you?"
  • Even if one is against bombing Iran on account of its civilians, one shouldn't act like Iran under its current rulers is a peace-loving nation that keeps to itself. I'll join the chorus if Trump bombs Greenland or Canada.
  • We had to destroy the village to save it.
  • I think you're mixing a term of art with the common English definition.
  • Turn all the under-mountain missile cities into super-mega-mall-cities with Whole Foods, McDonalds, indoor shooting ranges, nail salons, super-walmarts, hotels, apartments, casinos, mega strip clubs and free e-bikes to get from business to business as the tunnels go on for miles. Free unlimited, uncensored WiFi, everywhere. Air conditioning, everywhere. Make each section walking-friendly. Import millions of tourists. Free around-the-clock child care. Customer service center at every entrance with scantily clad male and female greeters that know how to say "I Love You" in every language. Free insulated water bottles with US and Iranian flag logos and unlimited free refills of any drink. Adult VR video viewing massage booths in every tunnel. Free DMT IV drip booths. Free Carls Jr. vending machines. Free trains, busses and camels that transport or relocate people from their homes to the apartments or hotels in the tunnels. Free health spa. Free tattoos with exotic inks that glow. VIP tunnels for wealthy tourists that lead directly to underground high security parking for the casinos with VIP casino entrance and private rooms. Sulfur hot tubs. Medical spa with full time doctors and nurses, waiting room has VR video games.

    How to pay for this? Sell their boring equipment. They can bore through solid granite at a relatively high speed. It should cover all of the above for years. After that runs out augment funds with some oil revenue. Get investors from around the world. Convert Iran into the tourist capital of the world and the place of least regulations. Or keep the boring equipment and keep adding new businesses, hotels and apartments.

    Most Iranian civilians should enjoy. Some IRGC may be turned. The ones that are not turned will not be able to resist checking it out. Some will come around with time. It's on Mossad to get the remaining hold-outs into a DMT and/or massage booth.

    Veteran, not active duty. Hope it still counts.

  • I think most Iranians would disagree. But hey, when did this stop you?
  • Uh the problem is Iranians have no purchasing power because of runaway inflation due to crushing US-imposed sanctions. None of the above would be possible without first ending sanctions.
  • This sounds like an abandoned Async ad for the backrooms.
  • There would be much time for breeding prodigiously, with a ratio of say 10 females to each male. Could be selected by a computer.